#5: A 30-Day Lifestyle Makeover

The hardest part of Whole 30 has not been the monotonous and restrictive diet.  While my eating routines are beginning to get tired and boring, I’ve learned that as long as I make a schedule and plan ahead for whatever I need to eat, I have no problem accepting the routine.  

It has not been the new combinations of ingredients, and learning how to prepare them.  This can also be planned for and taken into account, through visits to Pinterest for ideas throughout the week and then to Whole Foods a day or two later to stock up one what each new recipe will require. 

My sad salad next to birthday cupcakes in the office fridge

It has not been the time-consuming trips to Whole Foods, Stop & Shop, and farmers markets each week.  Although I prefer one-stop shopping, I can suck it up and make this exception for 30 days.   

Overhauling my lifestyle for 30 days has been incredibly hard.  Feel like grabbing a taco or falafel for lunch instead of packing something the night before or morning of work?  Nope, sorry buddy.  Wanna grab dinner or drinks with friends on the weekend?  Absolutely not.  How about Beer:30 after a long week at work?  Not for the next month, jerk.  Cupcakes in the office fridge! Interested? Not a chance.  Stop asking me rhetorical questions.  For these past 21 days, I've felt like a dog looking out a window at all the cats I could be treeing, mailmen I could be chasing, or other dogs I could be frolicking with.  You don't see how green the grass is on the other side of the fence until you realize how there are no tacos or Kit Kats in your own yard for 30 days (this might not be how that metaphor actually goes). 

Random pic of something else I can't enjoy

It really does take an iron will to resist the social pressures that you don't even realize exist until you start a program like this.  You'll find that really fun combinations of food, drink, friends, and merriment immediately present themselves as soon as you are not allowed to enjoy them.  Thankfully, I can rely on my Phantom of the Opera-esque bouts of reclusiveness and hermit-like brooding to help block out all social distractions - otherwise this challenge would be infinitely more difficult if I experienced additional pressure to hang out, drink, and eat outside of the Whole 30-approved areas than I already do.  

Once again, this blog has held me accountable to my actions.  Perhaps if I didn't feel like the anonymous readers out there (all 4 of you) would suddenly judge me for failing to finish this goal, I would sneak a Snickers bar or put cream and sugar in my coffee when no one was looking.  Thank goodness for anonymous and unsubstantiated peer pressure. I'm quickly learning that blogs can be, at their best, a solid commitment device...and at their worst, Foucault's panopticon.  I am an inmate, and you all are my jailors.  Thanks guys - you're the one thing keeping me from dumping bags of Cadbury mini-eggs into my mouth.

The one thing I've really been thinking about over these past three weeks is how many social encounters revolve around either a food or drink-related activity, and how this can impact people with a food or drink restriction. I used to be very familiar with these dietary restrictions, dating back to my few years spent as a vegetarian.  For anyone who isn't aggressive in defending their dietary restriction (I wasn't), decisions made in mixed groups about when and where to eat are often a no-win situation.  If you speak up, you have the potential to 'harsh everyone's meat mellow', and could be viewed as the group's unnecessarily difficult and high-maintenance pariah.  If you don't speak up, you end up cobbling together a meal from the 13 side dishes you've ordered off the back of the Chili's menu insert, the end result resembling what you might get from the world's worst tapas restaurant.

I think what is most alarming about this is how quickly I forgot what vegetarians (and non-drinkers alike) go through on a daily basis, now that I'm no longer one of them; this challenge has been a welcome reminder.  I always hated to be 'That Guy' ('Chad', for those loyal readers who get the reference) who by default mandates where an entire group needs to eat because of dietary restriction-associated values.  But even worse than that, I now fear becoming the guy who disregards other peoples' values by getting immersed in my own.  This idea can certainly extend beyond food and drink.

I'm fortunate to be doing this in a supportive environment, which is not lost on me as I work my way through the month. What is also not lost on me:  Nine more days until Pedro's Tacos are in my mouth!

#4: What the *** Am I Eating!!??! Part 1

What Am I Eating?

Many of you are probably wondering what my daily meals are looking like.  Given the absence of grain, dairy, legumes, sugar, and all processed food, that's probably the first thing I'd be thinking as well.  This has been especially challenging, because those 'food groups' probably comprised about 75% of my pre-Whole 30 diet. Below is a picture of what my food pyramid looked like prior to starting this challenge:

I'll admit that  eliminating all the ingredients I couldn't eat - while adjusting to all the new ingredients that I was 'restricted' to - was a little rough and frustrating; I outlined this in earlier posts. Thankfully I had prepped myself for cooking and preparing meals through my celebrity cookbook challenge last month.  I even had most of the core ingredients and spices on hand to begin.  

There are a couple 'core' ingredients that I've been relying on:

frittatatata

Eggs:  As I've mentioned, I've been eating a shitload of eggs.  I apologize to the towns in New England that are currently experiencing shortages as a result.  Obviously a great source of protein, and remarkably versatile.  I egg chicken breasts and then coat them with a coconut or almond flour-based breading for baking or frying, put hard-boiled eggs in my salad, scramble with coconut milk, or make frittatas.  I never get tired of all the egg combinations.  Let's see if that's still the case on day 31.

Yams:  A solid staple which is a welcome sweet addition to most meals.  Even though it's not required, I've been conditioned to need a third starchy/grainy side to complement my 'protein' and 'vegetable'.  WIth the required absence of grains, legumes, and white potatoes, yams have won the nomination.  I've been making yam hash (with eggs and onions), eating them like baked potatoes, and baking herbed sweet potato french fries.  Delicious, although I feel that my yam threshold may be nigh.  

chicken w/ avocado

Avocado:  I liken selecting proper avocados to surviving bear attacks; no matter how many times I've been told, I can never remember whether a firm or a soft avocado means it is ideal for use.  With bear attacks, I can never remember if I am supposed to jingle my car keys at a bear and otherwise make a ton of noise, or play dead in order to maximize my survival odds.  Why are these two basic premises so hard for me to remember?  Either way, avocados are delicious and bears are scary.  I recommend putting avocados on anything and everything, and staying away from bears.  

brocco/pepper sausage stir fry

Spinach/broccoli: Good as steamed vegetable sides, or in salads.  Spinach is also a sneakily decent source of calcium in my dairy-free world.  I really like spinach in all forms, and use it as the base in all my lunch salads.

Garlic/Cilantro/Thyme: There is no better-smelling ingredient combination in the world than these two lovelies cooking in a pan, swimming happily around in a pool of olive oil.  I have unfortunately been made aware that there is a sizable contingent of cilantro haters out there.  You know who else hates cilantro? Al Qaeda, convicted animal abusers, communists, and deadbeat dads.  I hope you're happy being part of this demographic.  

coconut chicken fingers

Coconut: Whether it's coconut oil, coconut milk, coconut flour, or unsweetened coconut flakes, coconut has been very helpful in its role as a dairy substitute, and providing much needed texture and flavor to many dishes.

Spices:  Various combinations of paprika, cardamom, cumin, and cayenne powder seem to go in many Whole 30-approved recipes - especially rubs for fish/beef and breading for chicken.  

 

spiced cauliflower, salsa chicken & squash

With a little digging, recipes have been easy to come by.  In addition to the wealth of Whole 30 and Paleo resources one can find on the internet with Google, Pinterest has also been surprisingly helpful. I was one of the many others who joined Pinterest a year or two ago when it suddenly became VERY popular; it seemed like 150 million people joined within the span of two days.  After I came to the conclusion that Pinterest was mostly for wedding planning, learning how to make hummingbird feeders out of plastic 2-liter soda bottles, or posting 'believe in the power of your dreams' -type quotations independent of context (or worse, by 'Anonymous'), I quickly became 'dis-Pinterested'. (HEH!) Come to find out, this is a GREAT source for recipes for anyone with dietary restrictions.  I found  many of my Whole 30 recipes on Pinterest (the results of which are displayed in many of the photos throughout this post).

A Week in the Life...

One of the hardest parts of Whole 30 is the planning - not just the 17 hours I spend each week shopping for groceries between 4 stores and a farmers market - but having something ready to go for breakfast and lunch during work days.  If I'd ever forget to prepare something the night before or the morning of work, I imagine there are very few places I can pick up food around the Financial District (where I work) that will be both satisfying and Whole 30 compliant. Per Natalie's advice (actually, she suggested similar egg 'muffins', but whatever), I started with learning how to make a frittata. This is remarkably simple, and takes 30-45 minutes from start to finish, depending on how many extra ingredients I decide to add.  I make enough for 2-3 days' worth of breakfast.  

On days where I'm not bringing frittata to work, I usually just have a lighter breakfast of fruit and a Larabar.   If you haven't tried Larabars yet, run, don't walk to the nearest grocery store and buy some.  Larabars are wonderful in their simplicity, and easily the best 'granola' bars I've ever had.  My favorite is Pecan Pie. Three ingredients - pecans, dates, and almonds - and it really tastes like a fricking pecan pie. I don't know how they do it - they've got some real David Blaine magic shit going on in their kitchen. You will not be disappointed.  And thank you Carolyn for the recommendation!  After you enjoy it, try and enjoy a Nature Valley granola bar and it's 17 ingredients the same way. I dare you. I think embalmers use half of those ingredients to preserve dead people. And no, Larabar Corp. isn't paying me.  But I'm not opposed to it, Larabar.  I accept PayPal. And bags of cash.

Lunch tends to be either whatever leftovers I had from dinner the night before, or a big-ass salad...with either chicken, beef or salmon prepared the night before (or sometimes leftover). On days when I have frittata, I forego the hard boiled egg I usually add and just rely on the veggies, avocado and meat for enough sustenance. I don't want to overdose on egg - that sounds like a terrible (not to mention, embarrassing) way to kick it - so I try to cap my daily intake to around 4 eggs.  If I'm still hungry later on in the afternoon, and especially if I'm going to the gym after work, I make sure to have another fruit, or some carrot sticks, to tide me over.   

For dinner, I've been try to mix in two or three new recipes a week.  As I mentioned, Pinterest has been extremely helpful in generating meal ideas.  Main dishes and sides are conveniently broken up on the site, making recipe mixing and matching easy.  Before I go shopping for the week, I look up a couple recipes that I've 'pinned' and add the ingredients I don't already have to my iPhone shopping list app.  These are some of the things I've made:

'chocolate' chili

baked salmon (w/ spice rub) with avocado salsa and plantains

beef with herbed sweet potato french fries

Lemon herbed salmon 

Usually I top off dinner with a fruit for dessert.  Lately it's been mango, although I have a new appreciation for apples.  

And this is how I celebrate on the weekends:

Scrambled eggs with coconut milk and a PILE of veggies and sausage, OR fried eggs mixed into a sweet potato hash (made with prosciutto or sausage). With a black coffee in my 'Don't Mess With Texas' mug, of course.

So to answer my question, ALL THIS is what I'm eating.  Probably better in the span of two weeks than I ever have.  

#3: A Good (30) Days to Die(t) Hard

Adjusting to the New Diet:

The thing about blindly committing to a challenge without any prior research is that sometimes you don't realize you're in over your head until you're gasping for air, trying to rip the inflatable alligator arm floaties off the 6 year old next to you.  Thankfully for the 6 year old in this metaphor, the Whole 30 challenge at this point has been more manageable than I had originally thought - although you wouldn't have thought that after some of the conversations and cautionary tales I've experienced with friends and Whole 30/Paleo 'survivors', after I told them what I was doing. You'd think I was about to start chemotherapy, or was about to sober up from a nasty cocaine and heroine addiction like Leonardo DiCaprio in The Basketball Diaries.  Apparently I am supposed to be moody, ill-tempered, lethargic, experience pounding headaches, and have a wonky and unreliable digestive system. Even the Whole 30 website attests that it's going to be a rocky 30 days:

The timeline continues in a less chart-friendly way to include:

Day 8-9: For the love of Gosling, my pants are TIGHTER. 

Days 10-11: The Hardest Days

Days 12-15: Boundless energy! Now give me a damn Twinkie. 

Days 16-27: Tiger Blood

(Interlude) Day 21: I am so over this.

Day 28: 28 is as good as 30…right?

Days 29-30: HolyOprahIt’sAlmostOverWhatAmIGoingToEatNow?!?!?!

 

I'm currently on day #13, and I'm happy to report that I have experienced very few of the sugar, carbohydrate, dairy, and legume withdrawal symptoms listed above. I think the worst of it to-date may have happened on day #2, when I was feeling exhausted - although I attribute this to the daylight savings time change and the subsequent four hours of sleep I received, rather than my new diet.  In addition to that, I also experienced an unusual lack of energy which hindered my gym workout on days #6, #8 and #11. 

My normal food pyramid

That said, my gym day today was great!  It must be all that 'boundless energy' I'm supposed to have at this stage.  Hopefully this is not a fluke moving forward.  I've also been in a great mood at work this week - not nearly as mean, snarky, condescending or sarcastic to my coworkers.  Hopefully this whole 'cheery' side effect will pass, and I can get back to how I normally treat them.

For me, the biggest dietary challenge so far has not been adjusting to the side effects of my new diet, but rather calibrating my dietary restrictions with my shopping list at the grocery store.  Once you start Whole 30, the food pyramid you're used to turns more into a food rectangle, with the subtraction of grains, legumes and dairy. Pictures are the best way to demonstrate this:

This is a very sad before and after photo of all the sugar and carby deliciousness I had to pack up for 30 days.  Gone are the cans of soup, graham crackers, flour, cornmeal, pasta, couscous, rice, and all other banned substances.  Tears were streaming down my face as I said my farewell.

The picture on the left shows what my cupboard now looks like.  Please note the coconut, almond flour, sun dried tomato, garlic, and all other (mostly) organic, un-preserved and less delicious items.  On the right is what my fridge currently looks like, with all the herbs, veggies and (mostly) grass-fed and organic meats blocking out the sun.  Covered by all the veggies is the 18-pack of eggs I purchased.  I've  never eaten more eggs in a (almost) two week span than I have now.  Same with avocados - I've eaten more of those than I have in the last 5 years.  

While adding more veggies to my grocery list helped to offset the cost of organic and grass-fed meats, buying base ingredients such as coconut oil and almond flour caused my first grocery bill to spike.  I had to get most of the ingredients at Whole Foods (or as my friend Kate calls it, 'Whole Paycheck') because Stop & Shop either only have brand items with banned additives, they didn't carry it, or because I left the store in a cloud of anger and frustration when I couldn't find where in the store these new and unfamiliar ingredients were supposed to be located.  Moving forward, I can now make 80% of my food purchases at either Stop & Shop or farmer's markets, but I'll still need to go to Whole Paycheck to get most of the organic and grass-fed meats that don't contain hormones, preservatives, or other additives. 

Obviously what goes along with new ingredients are new recipes, and I'll talk about that in a future post.

#2: WHY GIVE UP THE WHOLE ENCHILADA FOR 30 DAYS!!?!?

(It's important to note that A) Natalie and I officially 'started' Whole 30 on Monday, March 12, and B) we and are both writing on a new different topic each week without knowing what or how the other person is writing)

Why Whole 30?!!?

Tony:

If I were to pinpoint exactly when I decided to dedicate this month to Whole 30, I would probably place it somewhere between the 17 sticks of butter I melted down to make pecan squares and the 8 lbs of cheese I used in the penne broccoli and chicken. It was one hell of a month of eating; Cookie Monster would have nodded his head approvingly while observing the voracity and enthusiasm with which I tore into some of those meals and desserts.   While I had a great time making home cooked celebrity recipes with friends, I also felt like I had a feed bag filled with sugar strapped on my face. When looking for Challenge #3, the choice seemed obvious:  After this overindulgent month, I needed to find some way to slow my (fat)roll from gaining speed down the slippery slope of morbid obesity.  I hoped to get back to my pre-Challenge #2 weight, or even below. Was Whole 30 the answer?

Decidedly yes, and Natalie happened to not only be the reason, but also my role model for moving this plan forward.   Despite her tendency to swear like a pirate trucker several times an hour - and calling me a 'bi-otch' at least once or twice a day when we worked together - I still had enough respect for her when it came to things like this.  She was also far more knowledgable about local hip stuff and new diet and exercise trends than I was, and so I was more receptive when discussing Whole 30 with her.  I find it's also best to pursue activities like this through a buddy system, to have someone who can hold you accountable for your actions (sometimes you get held accountable by being called a 'bi-otch'). I liken this (probably inappropriately so) to a sponsor's relationship with an alcoholic - except in this case I should be earning sobriety coins for not shoveling down pints of Ben & Jerry's, or mowing down a row of peanut M&Ms like Pac-Man.  

Other reasons?  Not to make this sound like an online dating profile or anything, but I like the challenge of considering new ideas and trying new foods.  When it comes to food, I tend to be a creature of habit.  I can go to the grocery store 4 times each month, and end up with almost exactly the same shopping list each time.  Sometimes I might deviate and try to 'mix it up' with a different kind of deli meat and/or cheese that happens to be on sale.  Whoa, call the grocery police!  Don't get me wrong - I love variety, but at the end of the day, I hate dealing with the hassle of researching new recipes, making a new grocery list, and finding out where in each Stop and Shop the new ingredients are hidden. Hassle-free trumps hassle every day of the week, in Tony Wilbur's book.  But just like cooking celebrity recipes last month, and trying yoga the month before that, I'm looking forward to this challenge to force me out of my comfort zone and expand what I know and appreciate. I can do this for 30 days.

                                                                      *   *   *   

Natalie:

Why…. WHY?!

I am doing Whole 30 because Tony and his blog are awesome, and I want to be a part of that awesome. Beyond that, it was an unplanned and unprepared approach to a big 30 day commitment to healthy eating and living. I entered into this particular adventure…umm…slowly.

And, I FAILED.

Sunday

I live in Boulder, Colorado and spring is showing its lovely face (on and off) around here. The FIRST time I did Whole 30, I used theSunday before to grocery shop, cook, and mentally prepare (aka drink tequila and eat cheese) for the next 30 days. It was a big event. A kickoff if you will…

This time around, which is round III for me, I didn’t prepare at all! Instead of grocery shopping, I went to Avery Brewing Company, drank delicious IPAs, and ate a Philly cheese steak. I have no regrets about that day. The day after however… I had some regrets.

Monday

I had no plan for breakfast…Luckily, I had some leftover fajitas from the weekend that I am not entirely sure were sugar free, but I trusted in the fajitas because I had nothing else to eat. I also had some frozen blueberries that I topped with almond butter. The rest of the day was a success! Lunch at Chipotle (my go to fallback) and a compliant dinner. Success!

Tuesday
Eggs and chorizo for breakfast, leftovers for lunch and dinner. SUCCESS!

Wednesday

Here is where things get foggy…Breakfast was eggs again and for lunch I had sushi. OOPS! It was a mistake and I didn’t figure it out until I was sipping on miso soup. SOY. A big no-no. I thought about just quitting right there, but I ain’t no quitter. I ate the sushi, I confessed my mistake to Tony and moved on… to dinner. I ate a Whole 30 dinner, but decided to indulge in a beer since I had already F’d my day with sushi at lunch.

Thursday (also known as, “Oops, there was cheese on that…”)

So, yeah…. I met a friend out for dinner and we ordered Brussels sprouts, mac and cheese, and buffalo wings. I thought the Brussels were safe until I realized that the delicious crunchy stuff on the top was… cheese. OOPS!How many Oopses is that now? 2? There’s more…

Friday
A lot like Tuesday- I was back on track!

Saturday
I went to an all day workshop and managed to keep it together despite the cheese plate that came out in the afternoon. But… then came Sunday…..

Sunday

Not only did I eat a huge Cajun breakfast at Lucile’s in Boulder, I also skipped a 7k fun run to eat it. THEN, I ate whatever the hell I wanted for the rest of the day…. Including pasta and affogato for dessert. OOPS! STRIKE 3, 4 AND 5.

I won’t event go through the other days of the week because…. well….I pretty much quit paying attention. DO OVER!

(Starting tomorrow because I just ate a sub- it was free at work! I am a sucker for free shit even if it has grains and cheese in it.)

#1: Life As I Know It Is Over...For A Whole 30 Days

I had first heard about Whole 30 a year ago from my friend and office-mate Natalie.  As I had then pieced it together, Whole 30 was some sort of diet; all I knew was that for a window of time, she wasn't eating nearly as many cupcakes, brownies, or other treats that found their way to our office as the rest of us, and 'I can't, I'm on Whole 30' was her excuse.  In reality, she had probably told me about Whole 30 sooner than that, but was drowned out by the sound of rustling Kit Kat wrappers or loud crunching of 'Chicken & Waffles' Lays coming from my corner of the office.

I became indirectly aware of Whole 30 a year or two earlier, though my friends Kelly and Carolyn.  They followed a similar diet - Paleo - which they still follow. Paleo adheres to many of the same principles as Whole 30, and I remember thinking that it would be impossibly restrictive to follow - no high fructose corn syrup IV drip to start the day? Nope.  No King Size Reese's Peanut Butter Cup mid-morning snack? Inconceivable!  So when Natalie actually had my attention and told me about the program, I initially disregarded it as something I would never attempt.  

And now I'm doing it.

What Is Whole 30? 

Whole 30, at it's core, is a 30 day nutritional reset. The program details are outlined on their website, and in the book It Starts With Food.  This gives you a good sense of their founding principle:

Certain food groups (like sugar, grains, dairy and legumes) could be having a negative impact on your health and fitness without you even realizing it. Are your energy levels inconsistent or non-existent? Do you have aches and pains that can’t be explained by over-use or injury? Are you having a hard time losing weight no matter how hard you try? Do you have some sort of condition (like skin issues, digestive ailments, seasonal allergies or fertility issues) that medication hasn’t helped? These symptoms may be directly related to the foods you eat – even the “healthy” stuff. So how do you know if (and how) these foods are affecting you?Strip them from your diet completely. Cut out all the psychologically unhealthy, hormone-unbalancing, gut-disrupting, inflammatory food groups for a full 30 days. Let your body heal and recover from whatever effects those foods may be causing. Push the “reset” button with your metabolism, systemic inflammation, and the downstream effects of the food choices you’ve been making. Learn once and for all how the foods you’ve been eating are actually affecting your day to day life, and your long term health

For those of you who know me, you are most likely aware that I am generally cynical towardsEasy Does It'. I embrace all forms of change, but not at the expense of pragmatic or fiscal considerations. Or worse, embracing a change that history will end up ridiculing; one of my worst fears is having my kids in 2030 find pictures of me in whatever the future equivalent of parachute pants, acid washed jeans, adult overalls, or Uggs. My Spidey Sense tingles every time I feel like like I'm being sold snakeoil, and I can't deny that I have my guard up when it comes to lifestyle changes like Whole 30, from which people or companies are profiting.  That said, I have kept two things in mind when deciding to pursue this:

fads, trends, or anything that people grab on to and obsess over for a short period of time.  My motto could probably be summed up with some variation of '

1.  The program commitment is only 30 days, and the book was only $13.57 on Amazon (but if you dig through the website and online, EVERYTHING you need can be found without paying a dime).

2.  The program is about NOT eating sugar, carbs, processed foods, and foods with unnecessary additives and preservatives for only a month.  Is it a catastrophe that I swap out french bread and Baby Ruths for 30 days and swap in more vegetables, meats, and raw foods?

What can you eat on Whole 30?

For 30 days, you eat absolutely nothing that is tasty, interesting, or satisfying in any way.  Maybe that's a slight exaggeration, but definitely no Shamrock Shakes, Cadbury Mini Eggs or Ben & Jerry's (any flavor!).  To give you as sense of what one can eat, it's easier to list what one can't:

• Do not consume added sugar of any kind, real or artificial. No maple syrup, honey, agave nectar, coconut sugar, Splenda, Equal, Nutrasweet, xylitol, stevia, etc. Read your labels, because companies sneak sugar into products in ways you might not recognize. 
• Do not consume alcohol in any form, not even for cooking. (And it should go without saying, but no tobacco products of any sort, either.) 
• Do not eat grains. This includes (but is not limited to) wheat, rye, barley, oats, corn, rice, millet, bulgur, sorghum, amaranth, buckwheat, sprouted grains and all of those gluten-free pseudo-grains like quinoa. This also includes all the ways we add wheat, corn and rice into our foods in the form of bran, germ, starch and so on. Again, read your labels. 
• Do not eat legumes. This includes beans of all kinds (black, red, pinto, navy, white, kidney, lima, fava, etc.), peas, chickpeas, lentils, and peanuts. No peanut butter, either. This also includes all forms of soy – soy sauce, miso, tofu, tempeh, edamame, and all the ways we sneak soy into foods (like lecithin). 
• Do not eat dairy. This includes cow, goat or sheep’s milk products such as cream, cheese (hard or soft), kefir, yogurt (even Greek), and sour cream… with the exception of clarified butter or ghee. 
• Do not eat white potatoes. This is somewhat arbitrary, but if we are trying to change your habits (chips and fries) and improve the hormonal impact of your food choices, it’s best to leave white, red, purple, Yukon gold, and fingerling potatoes off your plate. 
• Do not consume carrageenan, MSG or sulfites. If these ingredients appear in any form on the label of your processed food or beverage, it’s out for the Whole30. 
• No Paleo-ifying baked goods, desserts, or junk foods. Trying to shove your old, unhealthy diet into a shiny new Whole30 mold will ruin your program faster than you can say “Paleo Pop-Tarts.” This means no desserts or junk food made with “approved” ingredients—no banana-egg pancakes, almond-flour muffins, flourless brownies, or coconut milk ice cream. Don’t try to replicate junk food during your 30 days! That misses the point of the Whole 30 entirely. 
• You are not allowed to step on the scale or take any body measurements for the duration of the program.

So, to sum up DO NOT eat anything you usually want to eat. What most surprised me about these commandments are that legumes aren't allowed.  The book indicates that legumes are an unnecessary source of carbohydrates, not a great primary source of protein, and rich in phytates — 'anti-nutrients which bind to minerals in the legumes'. Who knew?

So this is what I'll be doing for 30 days (and 9 more posts)...but I won't be doing it alone.  My roommate Whitney is doing it, and Natalie has also agree to do this (again) with me.  Natalie and I had a Skype chat a few days ago to cover the basics:

[3/7/14 1:00:02 PM] Natalie Canfield: Umm.... Did I commit to starting whole 30 on Monday? Just checking...

[3/7/14 1:00:36 PM] Tony Wilbur: Monday should work - although I don't think I'm going to get the book in time :-(

[3/7/14 1:00:55 PM] Natalie Canfield: awwww shiz- Well, you can use the website for guidance

[3/7/14 1:01:00 PM] Natalie Canfield: I don't even have the book

[3/7/14 1:01:01 PM] Tony Wilbur: my roommate whitney is doing it with me as well

[3/7/14 1:01:05 PM] Natalie Canfield: sweet!

[3/7/14 1:01:18 PM] Natalie Canfield: they have shopping lists and everything on the website.

[3/7/14 1:01:22 PM] Tony Wilbur: what's the website again?

[3/7/14 1:01:28 PM] Natalie Canfield: basically, the entire book is there, you just have to be willing to dig

[3/7/14 1:01:59 PM] Natalie Canfield: http://whole30.com/

[3/7/14 1:04:08 PM] Natalie Canfield: also, this is important: http://whole30.com/2013/08/revised-timeline/

[3/7/14 1:06:15 PM] Tony Wilbur: I'm just eating steak, bacon and eggs during every meal

[3/7/14 1:06:19 PM] Tony Wilbur: maybe a little spinach, too

[3/7/14 1:06:29 PM] Natalie Canfield: no bacon dude

[3/7/14 1:06:34 PM] Natalie Canfield: it has sugar in it

[3/7/14 1:06:41 PM] Tony Wilbur: all bacon?

[3/7/14 1:06:45 PM] Natalie Canfield: ha ha

[3/7/14 1:06:55 PM] Natalie Canfield: if you can find bacon without sugar, you will be a hero

[3/7/14 1:07:04 PM] Tony Wilbur: hm

[3/7/14 1:07:04 PM] Natalie Canfield: to all Whole 30ers

[3/7/14 1:07:10 PM] Tony Wilbur: fuck that shit

[3/7/14 1:07:13 PM] Natalie Canfield: it is part of the curing process

[3/7/14 1:07:16 PM] Tony Wilbur: I guess it's just steak and eggs

[3/7/14 1:07:31 PM] Natalie Canfield: my second time around, I didn't worry about sugar content less than 2%

[3/7/14 1:07:39 PM] Natalie Canfield: bacon falls into that category

[3/7/14 1:07:45 PM] Natalie Canfield: so does a lot of processed meat- like sausages.

[3/7/14 1:08:02 PM] Tony Wilbur: FUUUUUCK

[3/7/14 1:08:02 PM] Natalie Canfield: You are going to be shocked about what food items have sugar in them....

[3/7/14 1:08:05 PM] Natalie Canfield: it is NUTS

[3/7/14 1:08:14 PM] Tony Wilbur: apparently I can't eat anything that tastes good?

[3/7/14 1:08:21 PM] Tony Wilbur: this is going to be the LONGEST MONTH EVER

[3/7/14 1:09:54 PM] Natalie Canfield: NOT TRUE

[3/7/14 1:10:02 PM] Natalie Canfield: you will be shocled how delicious food tastes....

[3/7/14 1:10:19 PM] Tony Wilbur: I think I'm shocled right now!

[3/7/14 1:10:35 PM] Natalie Canfield: make these this weekend: http://nomnompaleo.com/post/7486819479/prosciutto-wrapped-mini-frittata-muffins

[3/7/14 1:10:59 PM] Natalie Canfield: Make enough to have 2-3 every morning- they are great to grab as a quick meal in the morning

[3/7/14 1:11:12 PM] Natalie Canfield: I just throw a couple in the toaster oven and they are DELICIOUS

[3/7/14 1:12:29 PM] Tony Wilbur: so I guess you are going to say that Toaster Strudels are not allowed either?

[3/7/14 1:13:07 PM] Natalie Canfield: you are correct

[3/7/14 1:13:15 PM] Tony Wilbur: FUCK

[3/7/14 1:13:19 PM] Natalie Canfield: did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on to this?

[3/7/14 1:13:27 PM] Tony Wilbur: of course not

                                                               *   *   *

As Natalie and I move forward with this the next 30 days, we'll each post 500 words on 9 different topics- without reading each other's before posting.  Enjoy! We won't.

#10: Fly Me To the Kitchen & Let Me Cook With Gregory Peck

Cooking Prep: I must admit, I'm a little over my head with this post. Frank Sinatra is the kind of prolific that makes you feel like you know everything and nothing about him at the same time. You know him well because he's woven into the cultural fabric of America, from decades' worth of music, cinema, awards, and red carpet events. Chances are, you don't remember where you first heard Fly Me To the Moon or Strangers in the Night, but you've always known about them. But once you try to look past the old Hollywood imagery and the songs, you can't tell where the man ends and the legend begins. 

Alright - that's about as serious as blogging on the topic of celebrity cookbooks gets, folks.  My own early experiences with Sinatra were from Saturday Night Live skits.  Both Phil Hartman and Joe Piscapo did great impersonations (albeit slightly racist and homophobic now that I look back) of older Sinatra.  Still funny, if you can look past some of the things that were apparently fine to say on TV in the 80s and early 90s.  

While digging around for a good Sinatra profile shot, I've discovered that Sinatra never had a bad photograph of himself taken. Seriously, Google his image.  It's just pages upon pages of suits, fedoras, tuxes, and class.  Granted, Sinatra grew up in a generation where TMZ wasn't waiting in the bushes outside his gym with a camera, or some 13 year old with a smartphone could take a shot of him during the one moment he loses his shit in public or gets arrested.  He's probably lucky to have avoided the internet era, when any misstep a celebrity takes ends up on a website (I'm talking to you too, Yanni, Shaun White and Academy Award winner Matthew McConaughey).  Sure, he could shape and control his image more easily than today's celebrities, but you'd think at least one 'unsuited' image would emerge.

I even tried googling 'Sinatra beach', to see if he ever wore a t-shirt, flip flops, and/or shorts, and this is what I came up with:

Strolling the Boardwalk

Suited up on a Yacht

Catching some sun

The man never took a day off from being classy.  And that even includes the cover of his cookbook (to a lesser extent):

Cookbook:

Sinatra pulled a fast one over on me with this cookbook.  Actually, I pulled a fast one over on myself.  I should have realized that 'celebrity cookbook' actually meant yet another compilation of celebrity recipes, rather than a cookbook by a celebrity.  This compilation book, released in 1996, balances out a wide range of stars with whom you're most definitely familiar with a bunch of older no-names popular in the 50s and 60s who are now probably dead.  Today we're going with a celebrity who falls right in the middle:  Gregory Peck.  This is someone you've heard of from the 50s and 60s (Roman Holiday, To Kill A Mockingbird)...and dead.  I'm only doing one recipe today, because it's a breakfast/brunch recipe - I figured I should get at least one in before concluding this challenge.  

Cooking Soundtrack: Tony Bennett - The Classics

Theme For the Morning:  'Happy Pappy'

Cooking Companion: Kate Beever, AGAIN! Glutton for punishment.

Recipe:

Sunday Morning Happy Pappy Eggs

8 eggs

1/3 cup whipping cream

2 tsps butter

1/3 cup chopped chives

4 slices of ham, cut in 1/2-inch squares

salsa

hot sauce

Blend eggs with cream. Scramble eggs in butter in large skillet over low-medium heat to soft consistency, adding chives and ham, and continue cooking, stirring constantly and gently with long-handled fork; do not overcook.

Serve eggs with salsa and hot pepper sauce.  Serves 4

**Special Warning From Gregory Peck**

'Children may not favor the chives or the hot stuff.  This is really a grown-up recipe. It will serve four adults with or without hangovers.  For those with hangovers, add a generous helping of home-fried potatoes, black-eyed peas or chili and beans.'

I tackled the eggs while Kate figured out how to use my grinder and french press to make coffee.  I chose this recipe for a couple reasons:  I HAD most of the necessary ingredients, I've never made scrambled eggs with whipping cream before, and it was simple and reasonably healthy.  AND IT WAS NAMED HAPPY PAPPY EGGS.  What better time to try Sunday Morning Happy Pappy Eggs then on Sunday morning?  Even though we were NOT hung over, I made home fries so that we'd have something other than just eggs to eat.  The whipping cream actually made the scrambled eggs better than I've ever had (sure beats the 2% or non-fat milk I usually use).  Since we weren't entertaining kids, we used a liberal amount of sriracha.  This is very simple and chives make everything look and smell better.  While we didn't use salsa (because we didn't have any), please feel free to apply liberally.  

Verdict: A very good, basic recipe.  Scrambled eggs with ham, chives, salsa, and a ton of hot sauce.  You can't go wrong with this on a Sunday (although you could challenge yourself with a more difficult recipe).  Here's what breakfast looked like:

Grades:

Cookbook Variety: A (there are a million recipes in this book.  You'll find something you like!)
Cost:  (eggs are cheap, yo!  The hot whipping cream will be your most expensive purchse)
Ease & Time of Preparation: A (10 minutes for the eggs, a little longer for the home fries)
Taste: A+ = (scrambled eggs, chives, ham, and hot sauce? Duh...)

Bonus Grade:

Level of Pappy Happiness: A-

Overall Grade: A (fuck it - this is the last recipe)